If you find "Green Lantern" somewhat lacking this weekend, don't blame Jack Black.
RELATED ON VULTURE: Rebecca Black pulls 'Friday' from YouTube
Seven years ago, long before Ryan Reynolds got involved, Black was set to star in a spoofy take on the superhero written by "Saturday Night Live" vet Robert Smigel. How different might it have been?
RELATED ON VULTURE: Gene Simmons talks about his family drama
According to GQ's Mike Ryan, who got his hands on the old script, Black's protagonist would have been selected for the Green Lantern corps owing to his bravery in eating coyote brains on a reality show, and his mentor, Sinestro, would have distracted Black during a crucial scene with the thought of Elmo knocking boots with Barbara Walters.
Put "The View" on while you watch the "Muppets"' new "Green Lantern" parody, and it's almost like this version got made!
RELATED ON VULTURE: Tupac's death is being investigated