Perhaps it's not surprising that Kevin Federline loved the glitz and the glamor that came with being married to Britney Spears in the early 2000s, but he also "loved her to death."
Kevin sat down with Us Weekly and really delved into his relationship with the global pop star, detailing what attracted him to her, how caught off guard we was when she filed for divorce, and he even touched on Britney's public meltdown.
"We had an instant chemistry -- and then it became a soap opera for the world. It surprised me how down-to-earth she was, with normal Southern values instilled by her parents -- but also, obviously, not that innocent," he said. "I have so many great memories that outweigh the bad."
Part of those good memories, he admits, had to do with living a lavish lifestyle that he was now privy to, thanks to his then-wife.
"Having 50 paparazzi suddenly in my face was a huge eye-opener. Our life was running at 150,000 miles per hour. I soaked up as much of the lifestyle as I could," he said. "I'd walk into a club and get a table worth $15,000 a night with unlimited free drinking. To not have to worry about making my next car payment felt like a huge weight lifted off my soul. But everything got so crazy."
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Crazy, yes, but things couldn't stay that way, at least for Britney, and she filed for divorce in 2006. Kevin told the magazine that he wasn't expecting her to divorce him, but, to his credit, he still chooses not to air out their dirty laundry.
"Britney proposing to me on a plane three months after we met and getting married two months later was just us living in the moment. I really thought I'd spend the rest of my life with her," he said. "There were a few drastic things that went down, which I'll never talk about, but overall we still had fun. So when she filed for divorce, I was completely caught off guard. Look, there are a million things I could say about her that would make huge headlines and cause a ton of drama, but for what? The truth is I loved her to death."
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Britney did make headlines with her epic public meltdown -- one that saw her shave her head -- but Kfed still, to this day, won't take the bait and really speak on her dark days.
"It was extremely tough watching her go through a phase where she was clearly not OK right after the divorce. There's a lot more I could have done to help," he said. "Taking full custody of the boys sucked the life out of me, but it was for them. I have to give Britney's dad, Jamie, a lot of credit for saving her. He made it so I could actually deal with her again."