Simon Cowell can't make up his mind about fellow American Idol judge Paula Abdul.
"Paula's frustrating, she's annoying and I can't understand half of what she's talking about -- but there's incredible comfort between us," he tells TV Guide (on stands April 30). "I think we're possibly secretly in love with each other."
He doesn't have as many warm feelings for Kara DioGuardi.
When asked if the fourth judge will be back next year, Cowell says, "I would imagine so. The only say I have is about Ryan [Seacrest], Randy [Jackson] and Paula. I've always made it clear that I wouldn't like to do the show without them."
Adding that extra judge was "bad enough," he opines. "Now it's a girl, huge problem. Girls do tend to talk a little bit more than guys. Randy's quick, and I don't say too much. But my God, these two!"
Another similarity between DioGuardi and Abdul: they both can't stop googling themselves.
"I'm probably the only person on the show who doesnt monitor himself [on the Internet]," he says. "All the contestants, all the judges, particularly the girls, [do]. If you're on TV, there are certain people who'll like you and there are a hell of a lot who'll hate you. You just have to get used to it."
Cowell thinks the contestants are a little boring this year, but he knows how to rile them up.
"My idea is to plant secret cameras in the house. And then we'd hear what they really think about one another. I'd like to see them fighting, screaming, hate each other," he says.
"I hate seeing a united bunch...it would be like taking part in the Olympics and holding hands and crossing the finish line together," he continues.
Who does he think will win this season?
"The final will be Danny [Gokey] and Adam [Lambert]...55/45, Danny versus Adam," he says. "I don't care who wins, by the way, I just want it to feel like a competition."
(Meanwhile, an iTunes glitch revealed that Lambert and Kris Allen are outselling Gokey, The New York Post reports.)
Cowell -- who also judges on The X-Factor and Britain's Got Talent -- may not be around to see another season of Idol.
"I think nine seasons is a lot," he says. "I've had the best time ever in my life, and then you consider doing something new or taking a break."