The Oscars can be absurdly glamorous, abundantly self-aggrandizing and achingly stodgy. Thankfully, there's Twitter.
During the Academy Awards broadcast, an entirely unsanctioned commentary streams across the social media site, offering parody to the pomp.
Here follows an entirely subjective collection of the best tweets of Oscar night, which has become as much an annual event for Twitter as it has for the movies.
— "Last year's Best Picture: An English dude who couldn't speak. This year's: A French dude no one could hear." — Author and comedian Andy Borowitz,
— "I think it would be cool if an actor changed his name to Oscar Buzzworthy." — Comedian Norm Macdonald.
— "The only people who look in the mirror and think, `Perfect!' are murderers and Bradley Cooper." — Kelly Oxford, writer and famed tweeter.
— "When people go over, one of the Cirque people should swoop them up into the rafters." — Comedian and actor Patton Oswalt.
— "Cirque de Soleil was ok but the big secret they won't tell you is they rehearse that stuff beforehand. Lame." — Director David Wain.
— "Christopher Plummer's mustache is THE FINEST MUSTACHE." — Comedian John Hodgman.
— "Wait a second Max Von Sydow and Christopher Plummer are different people!" — Comedian Paul Scheer.
— "It's weird that the people I least enjoy hearing speak are actors." — Comedian Michael Ian Black.
— "3 of those people are alive they just haven't worked in a while." — TV host Bill Maher.
— "I remember when I was a kid and me and my family would live talk the Oscars." — Comedian Nikki Glaser
Jake Coyle can be reached at: http://twitter.com/jake—coyle