Nicole Scherzinger Opens Up About Bulimia Battle: 'It's Embarrassing'
- Photo: Optic Photos/PacificCoastNews.com1 of 17
- Photo: DDAA/ZOB/WENN2 of 17
- Photo: Adriana M. Barraza/WENN3 of 17
- Photo: John Shearer/WireImage4 of 17
- Photo: JPVegas/Fame Flynet5 of 17
- Photo: FlynetUK/Fame Flynet6 of 17
- Photo: WENN7 of 17
- Photo: Barcroft Media/StarTraks8 of 17
- Photo: @iamwill/Twitter9 of 17
- Photo: © Al Powers/Retna Ltd.10 of 17
- Photo: BJJ/Fame Flynet11 of 17
- Photo: Marco Piovanotto/StarTraks12 of 17
- Photo: ELIOT PRESS/Bauer-Griffin13 of 17
- Photo: Charles Sykes/Invision/AP14 of 17
- Photo: WENN15 of 17
- Photo: Jeff Bottari/Invision/AP16 of 17
Nicole Scherzinger was suffering in silence during her seven years as the Pussycat Dolls' lead singer.
In her VH1 "Behind the Music" special (airing Oct. 7), the 34-year-old singer opens up for the first time about her struggle with bulimia.
"It's embarrassing. I never spoke about it. Like I said, I never want to play a victim, and I never wanted my family to hear about things from me because I think it would break their heart, you know," Scherzinger says. "I guess it was like my addiction, right? I never did drugs, but kinda doing things to myself was my addiction. It's like when I got off stage, I was on this high, and I'd come back to my room and I'd be alone, so I would just do things. My bulimia was my addiction; hurting myself was my addiction."
Scherzinger -- who released her debut solo album, "Killer Love," in 2011 -- says she "did it everyday for, like, years. Every time I had a second to be alone, I was doing something to myself. You get, like, blisters on your hands or scars on your hands, and I'd try to hide those. I think the girls could tell."
The Hawaiian-born, Kentucky-raised musician joined the Pussycat Dolls in 2003 following the success of the burlesque troupe of the same name.
During her revealing chat, Scherzinger also estimates she "probably did 95 percent" of the singing "on my own" for the girl group's 2005 debut album, "PCD." "I hope I don't get in trouble for the stuff that I say," Scherzinger says, "but I'll never forget I finished the album, PCD, and [executive producer Ron Fair] and I brought the girls into the studio and we played it for them. It was the first time they'd ever heard the music."
Despite the hardships she sometimes faced, Scherzinger -- who first found fame as a member of the made-for-TV band Eden's Crush -- says ex-bandmates Melody Thornton, 28, Ashley Roberts, 31, Kimberly Wyatt, 30, Jessica Sutta, 30, and Carmit Bachar, 38, are "like my sisters."
Scherzinger's Behind the Music airs Sunday, Oct. 7, at 9 p.m. EST on VH1.
This article originally appeared on Usmagazine.com: Nicole Scherzinger Opens Up About Bulimia Battle: "It's Embarrassing"
MORE ON WONDERWALL:
"DWTS" champion Val Chmerkovskiy gave Wonderwall's Kirby Kristen a salsa lesson, dished on his win, that heavy mirror ball trophy, and the upcoming tour!Watch Video »
The Rock rips his shirt before epic "San Andreas" premiere on today's Celebs Gone Social.Watch Video »
Emma Stone and Bradley Cooper get the giggles while discussing their first impressions of each other, weird encounters in Hawaii and more!Watch Video »
Youtube for 90210
From Jenna Marbles to PewDiePie, find out which Youtube sensations we think should star in “Beverly Hills, 90210” if the show was cast today!Watch Video »
Find out how Duchess Kate and Prince William are coping with little sleep on Replay hosted by Wonderwall's Kirby Kristen.Watch Video »
Check out Emma Stone, Emily Blunt, and Julianne Hough's style statements on this week's OMG Celeb Fashion hosted by Wonderwall's Kirby Kristen.Watch Video »
Like us on Facebook?
UP NEXT'Best night'
From Crowd Ignite