"Teen Wolf" alum Charlie Carver is being the person he needed when he was younger.
The 27-year-old, who's twin brother Max Carver is also an actor, came out as gay in a lengthy essay in a series of posts on Instagram on Jan. 11.
"As a young boy, I knew I wanted to be an actor," he captioned the first of five posts of the "Be Who You Needed When You Were Younger" meme. "I knew I wanted to be a lot of things! I thought I wanted to be a painter, a soccer player, a stegosaurus... But the acting thing stuck. It was around that age that I also knew, however abstractly, that I was different from some of the other boys in my grade."
"Over time, this abstract 'knowing' grew and articulated itself through a painful gestation marked by feelings of despair and alienation, ending in a climax of saying three words out loud: 'I am gay,'" he continued. "I said them to myself at first, to see how they felt. They rang true, and I hated myself for them. I was twelve. It would take me a few years before I could repeat them to anyone else, in the meantime turning the phrase over and over in my mouth until I felt comfortable and sure enough to let the words pour out again, this time to my family."
Charlie went on to describe coming out to his family as "the beginning of a very-adult-notion of [claiming] my own Authenticity."
He also detailed his struggle to come out publicly after finding success as a young actor.
"The acting thing HAD stuck, and at nineteen I started working in Hollywood. It was a dream come true, one I had been striving for since boyhood," he wrote. "But coupled with the overwhelming sense of excitement was an equally overwhelming feeling of dread- I would 'have to' bisect myself into two halves, a public and private persona, the former vigilantly monitored, censored, and sterilized of anything that could reveal how I self-identified in the latter."
"[As] an actor, I believed that my responsibility to the craft and the business was to remain benevolently neutral - I was a canvas, a chameleon, the next character," he continued. "For the most part I had a duty to stay a Possibility in the eye of casting, directors, and the public. If I Came Out, I feared I would be limiting myself to a type, to a perception with limits that I was not professionally comfortable with. And I created in my imagination an Industry that was just as rigid in this belief as well."
So what made this the right time for Charlie to make a public declaration about his sexuality?
"Things in this business have changed and will continue to," he wrote.
"I now believe that by omitting this part of myself from the record, I am complicit in perpetuating the suffering, fear, and shame cast upon so many in the world," he added. "In my silence, I've helped decide for to you too that to be gay is to be, as a young man (or young woman, young anyone), inappropriate for a professional career in the Arts (WHAAA???)."
"So now, let the record show this- I self-identify as gay," he concluded. "As a young man, I needed a young man in Hollywood to say that- and without being a dick about it, I owe it to myself, more than anything, to be who I needed when I was younger."
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