As the Nov. 4 episode of "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" aired, Khloe Kardashian had to relive the joy and pain she experienced last April when she learned, just a few days before giving birth to daughter True, that NBA star boyfriend Tristan Thompson had cheated on her.
Khloe took to social media to share her thoughts and feelings before, during and after the show -- which revealed that little sister Kylie Jenner is the one who actually old Khloe what Tristan had done after seeing reports about his infidelity -- and she didn't hold back.
Before the episode aired, Khloe posted several emotional tweets about what viewers were about to see along with a clip from the show. "Tonight's episode is an uncomfortable and super emotional one for me, but when we signed up for this show over a decade ago, we signed up for a reality show, which meant showing you guys inside our lives, the good, the bad and the ugly," Khloe explained, as reported by People magazine. "To relive these moments all over again is incredibly difficult emotionally but I also hope that with every [trial], tribulation and curve ball life throws at us, that we ALL get to learn from our journeys."
Khloe, who went into labor in the wake of learning the heartbreaking news about the man she loves, thanked daughter True for getting her through the ordeal. "Amidst the tough times, I have been blessed with the ultimate gift, my angel who has changed my life in ways I never could have imagined," she wrote. "Remember that you are never alone in your pain, and that everything is temporary. Pain, joy, elation, panic, anxiety, it is all temporary. Be grateful for the experiences that continue to build character, and make you who you are."
Khloe also responded to fans' tweets and commented on the episode on Sunday night -- and noted that she will wait and see how much more she'll say depending on how she's feeling next week as the cheating scandal/birth saga continues to air.
"Thank God a camera was NOT with me in Cleveland!!! I won't put in writing what I did but let's just say he's LUCKY I was 9 months pregnant," Khloe told a fan who praised her sisters for being logical and supportive with her amid the drama.
Khloe also expressed her unhappiness with the show's production schedule. "I love filming for the show and I am proud that we are all strong and brave enough to be vulnerable BUT we have to start airing shows closer to real time. This episode is about 7 months old and it's a lot to relive all over again But maybe I need to ," she mused in another tweet.
When a fan asked Khloe if Tristan was watching the episode with her, she replied, "He probably should huh?"
Khloe also admitted that she was grateful Kylie ultimately decided to tell her what was going on back in April. "I can't believe Kylie thought she would hurt my feelings," Khloe tweeted. " I needed to see what was happening and better from my family then by someone else."
Khloe also explained why she tried to stay so positive and why she wanted Tristan there when she gave birth despite what he'd done. "I wanted to have a beautiful birthing experience for myself and for the memories of what I choose to share with True when she's older. I want her to have videos and pictures of her daddy there, holding her etc. I want her to know she is LOVE and my happiness! Babies feel energy!" she explained, kicking off another series of tweets.
"I chose to put my feelings aside for the birth and to try and have as much positive energy that I could. My only thought was about the birth of my daughter. I wasn't going to let ANYONE disrupt anything less than what she deserved. Joyous love. I chose to be mature & strong for True. I waited for this day for so many years! I know now, looking back that I was in shock because I couldn't believe that this would ever happen to me but I'm still very proud of myself for how I handled everything. True gave me the peace and strength I needed."
Khloe also didn't spare Tristan when a fan lamented that the Kardashians were chronicling the cheating scandal on national television at the same time she was giving birth. "Yes, they signed up for the show & publicity. But there are certain things where common decency should prevail. JMO. I'm so sorry," the fan wrote.
Khloe responded, "Thank you love! I appreciate that! But HE made it public. Not us. So I had to publicly deal with all of this SMH."
Without revealing how she and Tristan are faring now, Khloe made it clear she's not looking forward to next Sunday's episode either. "Ugh I have to relive it more next week," she tweeted along with a couple face-palm emojis.