Did we suddenly wake up in 2006? The only thing missing from Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan's brewing, throwback feud is Britney Spears flashing a lady part. Here's the latest, for those who enjoy a little frenemy-style nostalgia on a Monday morning.
According to Barron, he plans to sue Lohan and writer Ray Lemoine, who he believes carried out the attack at LiLo's behest. Police have been attempting to speak with Lindsay and Ray, but haven't yet had any luck tracking them down.
In a statement to TMZ, Lemoine insists Lohan had nothing to do with incident, and says things only became physical with Barron when he refused to leave Lemoine's rented house and put his dukes up.
Lohan, who was a guest at the luxury digs during the annual Art Basel festivities, denies accusations that she ordered the attack after Barron bad-mouthed her.
In fact, she denies being anywhere near the scuffle, although video shows Barron seemingly confronting her after the fight.
"There were a bunch of kids at the house, when Ray got back from a party, who weren't meant to be staying there," a source tells the New York Daily News. "They had all been up all night drinking, and Barron was one of them."
When Lemoine showed them the door, the insider says Barron pulled the old, "Don't you know who I am? Do you know who my sister is?' Barron just snapped at Ray and started pushing him and shouting at him, and that's when Ray hit him."
Barron posted a photo of his purported injuries on Instagram, prompting Paris, 32, to go all Sonny Corleone in the comment section, if Sonny used emoticons: "They both will pay for what they did. No one [bleeps] with my family and gets away with it!!" She reportedly met with a lawyer on Saturday.
Lemoine is apparently taking Paris's threat seriously.
"I'm scared of the Hiltons and Paris' Cash Money crew [she has a recording deal with them], so I am seeking refuge in Cuba," he tells the Daily News (tongue possibly in cheek). "Castro hates the Hiltons and took their Havana hotel in 1959 as a base after conquering Cuba, so they are stoked I'm coming down to hate capitalism. Viva la Lohan!"
Lindsay, for her part, remains on probation for various scrapes with the law. No word on whether the cameras from the Oprah-overseen reality show captured any of the incident.
ALSO ON WONDERWALL: