Has all that Botox and saline finally seeped into Heidi Montag's brain? She's not only reaffirming her love for Spencer Pratt, but she's also accused of giving major diva-tude on the set of "The Hills."
(That all this Speidi noise comes just weeks before the final season "The Hills" begins airing is, we're sure, just a happy coincidence.)
Anyhoo, let's start with the matrimonial meltdown whispers, which began Monday night when OK! reported that Heidi, 23, had packed up her triple-D boobs and walked out on Spencer, 26, whom she recently fired as her manager, replacing him with a psychic, whom she also fired.
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"She's moving out of her house and away from Spencer," tattled a source, with another snitch noting how Montag "hates having to admit" that her frenemy, Lauren Conrad, was ahead of the curve in disliking her creepy, flesh-color-bearded hubby.
"She was right," says the spy. "He is a selfish jerk."
Nuh-uh, insists Heidi, who made a beeline to People magazine to shoot down the rift rumblings.
"I'm not moving out," she declares. "I love Spencer with all my heart."
Pratt, who after his more flammable half's plastic surgery overhaul revealed his favorite feature was her hair, chimes in, "I love my wife more now than I ever thought I could."
Heidi helpfully points out their relationship issues will be featured on the show, which she can't wait to see come to an end.
"I'm so excited 'The Hills' are finally over so I won't be edited by anyone," she enthuses. "This will be the first time people can truly see us for who we are."
Yeah, we're terrified by that prospect, too.
"It's finally time to move on," continues Montag. "The 'Hills' has told the story of struggle and of finding myself in L.A., so it's time for me to hang up all the drama like fighting and divorce talk with Spencer and become the mogul I am."
Go ahead, laugh and get it out of your system, because it only gets more obnoxious from here. Seems Heidi's bit part in the Adam Sandler-Jennifer Aniston comedy "Just Go With It" has gone to her fat-injectioned head.
RELATED: See more pics of Heidi
On Monday, she posted a picture on her Facebook page showing her surrounded by a half-dozen burly bodyguards. And despite our initial theory, they were not charged with keeping the general public safe from Montag's pointy, prodigious breasts of doom.
According to "Access Hollywood," Heidi acted up while on a photo shoot with her "Hills" cast mates over the weekend, refusing to leave her hotel room to pose for pictures with the likes of Audrina Patridge, Brody Jenner and Kristin Cavallari.
Her reasoning, reports Us Weekly: "I'm a movie star now!"
Montag's rep, however, insists to "Access" that she was suffering from mono, which rendered her unable to speak, a seemingly serendipitous circumstance that the rest of the cast knew nothing about.
"Kristin and I just filmed with her, probably four days ago and everything seemed fine," says Audrina. "But, I don't know."
Cavallari was slightly more forthcoming. When asked if she was miffed over Montag's antics, she grouchily responded, "Yeah, of course."
As for the bodyguards, "Spencer's been banned from the set," a spy tells Us, "so Heidi feels safer with her security team around."
The crystal-addicted Pratt is serving a six-week suspension for allegedly threatening a female producer who had the audacity to ask him to do something.
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