Three years ago this week, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes said "I do" in an extravagant ceremony in Italy, a vow-swap that ended with the bride and groom sharing an over-the-top lip-lock at the altar that lasted so long their guests reportedly began shouting "Stop! Stop!"
The couple's public affection wasn't as uncomfortably conspicuous as they marked the Nov. 18 milestone with an early celebration last Saturday in Boston, a romantic night out that came just days before a pair of tabloids presented them with an unwelcome anniversary gift: allegations of marital strife.
"Katie's Regrets," blasts the cover of Us Weekly. "Miserable after 3 years under Tom's control."
The mag charges that the actress, 30, is unhappy after agreeing to a "marriage contract" with Cruise, 47, that offers her a mountain of money, provided she sticks with him for seven years and gives 3-year-old daughter Suri a sibling, among other ostensible stipulations.
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"Katie has virtually no say in their marriage and hates it," maintains a source, with another chiming in, "Essentially, everything in Katie's life is orchestrated by Tom."
Spies contend the actor is extremely detail-oriented when it comes to his missus, offering her tips on everything from what to eat to how to style her hair to her clothes and skin tone (seems he prefers her "pale" like ex-wife Nicole Kidman).
"He wants Katie to be happy," an insider says of his rumored hands-on approach. "That is genuinely the reason. He makes an effort to get her out of the house and plans everything."
Cruise's attorney insists all is well in their marriage and denies there's a contract.
Meanwhile, Star also discusses the alleged marriage contract (this one is 100 pages and supposedly expired on their anniversary), but tries a different tack by positing that Katie could write a "$15 million tell-all" unless Tom caves to her demands for more money, career assistance -- you know, the usual.
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Leaving aside the minor detail that Holmes likely signed the most iron-clad confidentiality agreement known to man, the tab suggests the "explosive and embarrassing exposé" could uncover such tidbits as "Tom's obsession with his body" and his "secret Scientology mobile unit" (basically a well-equipped SUV).
Among the questionable tales: Cruise "sleeps on his back, because he says it helps prevent him from getting lines on his neck and around his eyes," says a snitch. "He even puts pillows on either side of himself so he can't roll over!"
Oh, and he allegedly likes to chow down on junk food (Twinkies, Gummi bears, milkshakes) but covers up his sweet tooth by saying the goodies are for Suri.
Tom's rep reacts to the tabloid's accusations just as you'd expect, railing to Gossip Cop, "This is complete nonsense, without truth and utter garbage."
And though the weeklies will probably make an issue out of the fact that Cruise and Holmes didn't spend their actual anniversary together, the duo's ahead-of-schedule (and Suri-free) celebratory evening had the necessary lovey-dovey feel.
"They held hands the entire night," a staffer at Boston eatery Bricco tells People magazine. "They had a romantic dinner."
Tom reportedly reserved the restaurant's entire second floor for the occasion, setting the scene with candlelight and roses. On the menu: pasta, Chilean sea bass and Wagyu steak.
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After their quality time over the weekend, the pair headed back to work, with Katie in New York for the ensemble pic "The Romantics" and Tom in Austria to shoot scenes for the spy flick, "Knight & Day."
And despite being put through the rumor mill this week, Holmes appeared upbeat.
"She is in a great mood," an on-set snitch tells the mag, "but I think you can tell she misses [Tom]."
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