It says something about the insulated, E-meter-filled world that Tom Cruise lives in that the most normal thing he's done in ages involves a cross-dresser and a swat across the buttocks. The New York tabloids report the actor wangled an invitation to a "naughty," paddling-inclusive birthday party for Matt Damon last weekend in London.
How'd this happen? Turns out Cruise is in town filming "All You Need Is Kill" with Emily Blunt, who's married to Damon's pal John Krasinski, who arranged the birthday get-together at burlesque club The Box (insert appropriate double-entendre here).
Also on the guest list was another A-list Damon buddy, Chris Hemsworth, who was there with his wife, Elsa Pataky, along with Cruise's fellow "Kill" cast member, Bill Paxton.
In the course of the evening, the stars "got paddled on their rears" by the club's cross-dressing hostess, according to the Post, with Damon singled out for "extra spanking" in honor of his birthday.
"They all had a fantastic night enjoying the shows and partying till the end," says the spy.
No word on whether Tom's birthday gift to Matt was keeping his cakehole closed about the wonders of Scientology.
Either way, such socializing is a change of pace for Cruise, who has been in London since his divorce from Katie Holmes was finalized in August.
Perhaps he's hoping that some of the cool factor possessed by Matt, John and Chris will rub off on him, with or without a paddle, and that a good portion of the population will cease seeing him as peculiar and proselytizing.