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Sometimes, a report surfaces that's so ridiculous we hope against hope that it's true. Case in point: a big-screen drama starring Britney Spears as a time traveler who lands in World War II-era Germany. Last week, the Examiner claimed the on-tour popster was considering a starring role in a flick called "The Yellow Star of Sophia and Eton," in which she'd play Sophia LaMont, a time machine builder (just go with it) who heads into the past and falls in love with Eton, a prisoner in a concentration camp. So far, totally riveting, right? The lovebirds return to the present and Sophia converts to Judaism so they can marry. Alas, they both end up dead because of their religion. Yeah, the ending might need some work. Sadly, we're going to have to wait a little longer for Brit to follow up the insta-classic that was "Crossroads." Her rep tells us that the movie rumor is "completely not true."

RELATED: Check out photos of Britney Spears

Oprah Winfrey sure knows how to inspire employee loyalty. The Chicago Sun-Times reports the moneybags mogul is treating her Harpo staff and their families to a Mediterranean cruise. Oprah is picking up the tab for all transportation expenses, along with food, drinks and various recreational outings at ports of call in Spain, Italy, Greece, Turkey and Malta. The paper estimates the Big O's largesse will set her back about $5,400 per person. Four years ago, Winfrey pulled a similar act of generosity by surprising staffers with a getaway to Hawaii.

Megan Fox is trying to make amends for crushing a boy's soul into a million pieces by ignoring the yellow rose he pleadingly offered her following the London premiere of "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" on June 15. The oh-so-quotable starlet tells Collider.com that she's "horrified" and "so embarrassed" over the much-discussed incident, which has already inspired a song (sample lyric: "She just turned up her nose at his rose"). "I feel so sad for him," Megan mea culpas. "That kills me." She says she would never knowingly rebuff a young fan, and insists she was oblivious to his fragrant floral gift due to the blinding flashes of the paparazzi. Fox has even sent out a personal apology to the tyke, saying, "I'm sorry, sweet boy. I would never do that to you. I would gladly accept your rose if I see you again."

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In related news, Megan's "Transformers" co-star Shia LaBeouf has a perfectly reasonable explanation for proclaiming to Playboy that his mother is "the sexiest woman I know" and he would marry her if he could. "It was Mother's Day coming up and I don't have any problems appearing crazy to make my mother smile," the oversharing actor tells "Extra." "But she is the most beautiful woman on this planet and I love her. She's fly as hell. I stand by that. My mom's awesome..." Shia adds that the sentiment behind his statement, "I would be with my mother now, if she weren't my mother, as sick as that sounds," was completely misconstrued. "I think the sickness is also on the other end to be able to twist the words and make it as ridiculous as that," he kvetches. "Clearly, I'm not having sex with my mother. It's ridiculous."

RELATED: See photos of Shia LaBeouf

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